Drinking Fountains at VHS and the Boy Scouts

I am fed up with the drinking fountains at the high school. They just don't work like they should. Some shoot water at you so high and fast that you have to dodge out of the way; others are more of a trinkle. You would literally have to put the metal part in your mouth to get some water into it. Some of the drinking fountains are literally a fountain because they have more than one stream of water, which is really annoying because when you try to drink out of one you get sprayed in the face with the other. I took a drink out of one the fountains and sprayed my hand with water while I was holding the button down. I took a drink out of another one, and it just gave me a whole shower.

Is it impossible to get a few that work? Couldn't they just replace a few of the ones that are broken? Or maybe just fix them. I would settle to have them fixed. It's just an annoyance that needs to be changed, but as we have seen before, it takes the school so long to realize there is anything wrong before they fix things.

Some of you may be aware that I passed my Eagle Scout board of review this weekend, which technically makes me an Eagle Scout. I think that I have earned my right to give my opinion of the Boy Scouts, so here it comes. So if you are the Boy Scouts, you may want to find a fox hole, take cover, and cover your head because there is about to be some carpet bombing:

I didn't like the Boy Scouts. A bit of an understatement, I guess. I can't remember a single time in which I actually had any fun. There's just something about learning stuff that you are never going to use that really really really annoys me. I am never going to have to learn how to inflate my dress clothes, so I can not drown. We had to do that in swimming also, and come to think of it, I hated that too. I suppose it is a good thing to learn though. That way if you ever fall into water that is over your head while wearing dress clothes and no one sees you, you'll be okay. I can't think of how that could possibly happen because if you are wearing dress clothes, you are with other people, that‘s just a given. Only retards go swimming in dress clothes by themselves.

What was I talking about, again? Oh yeah, Boy Scouts. First off, it's time for the name to be changed. That's why I am proposing to rename the Boy Scouts, the Junior Ninjas. Who would not want to be a Junior Ninja, seriously? I know I would. That's because a synonym for Ninjas is awesome, and who doesn’t want to be awesome. Second, I think camping is stupid. I have nothing wrong with camping during the summer when it is warm and sunny and hardly rains. But during winter, that's just dumb. “Hey guys, let's leave all our modern appliances at home and go sit in the woods in the rain and cold!!!!” “YAY! That sounds fun.” And by fun I mean hell on earth. My ancestors did not fight wooly mammoths and saber tooth tigers so that I could sit in the woods on the weekend and get rained on.

So now that I gave my opinion let's think of some slogans:
The Boy Scouts: It's no fun.
The Boy Scouts: The only place you can find good, old-fashioned sexism these days.
The Boy Scouts: Everyone is welcome except females, gays, aethists, kids below the age of twelve, and guys older than eighteen.
The Boy Scouts: Helps turn U's into A's. That is gUys into gAys.
The Boy Scouts: We're all fat.
The Boy Scouts: We'll throw you into the woods with nothing but a sleeping bag.
The Boy Scouts: Experience the rich tradition of getting mauled by bears.
The Boy Scouts: Helping boys experiment with their sexuality since 1910.
The Boy Scouts: Earn badges and keep them hidden in your room.
The Boy Scouts: The lucky ones die.
The Boy Scouts: What happens here, stays here.
The Boy Scouts: No shirt, no shoes, nooooooooo problem.
The Boy Scouts: Helping sexual predators find little boys since 1910.